Where were you at in your music career when you had your first child? Was there much discussion about how that life choice would affect your career within the music/entertainment industry?
I hadn’t become a musician yet when I had my first child at 25. I was still in graduate school taking my master's in Legal Philosophy and just dreaming of being a singer. I had also recently lost my mom and had had this moment of realization about how important LIFE was. Life with CAPITAL LETTERS. I didn’t want to sit in a classroom and talk about legal theories. I wanted to live because life seemed so short after watching my mom die from cancer. I wanted to get married, have a baby and live. I stayed in school and tried to be a mom and a grad student at the same time and it was so challenging to do it all. I just couldn’t juggle everything and my degree kept dragging on and on. And then, three years later, I started writing music and singing locally and I realized that this dream I had of being a singer wasn’t going to go away. I dropped out of my master's and decided to record an album and truly go for it. So, I kind of went backwards compared to many musicians I know that started in music first and then had children. I thought that my kids would be better off growing up with a parent who was doing something they loved than the opposite.
As a working parent in the music industry, what are some of the biggest challenges you are facing?
Some of the biggest challenges for me are just not being physically there for my kids. Children need their parents. Period. Being on the road takes me away from them and what they are experiencing throughout their growth and development. I have had a lot of health challenges which have required me to cancel everything and stay home and the incredible benefit of that has been more time with my kids. Yay for brain injuries, I guess. No, that doesn’t sound quite right. But you get what I mean.
What is one change (big or small) within the industry that could make a positive impact for working parents?
I think if music were valued at a higher level and performance fees kept the rate with inflation and our increasing costs, musicians could perhaps work less and earn more, allowing them to be with their families and loved ones more of the time. I also love working on concerts that take place a bit earlier in the day, even by an hour or so. They allow me to get home earlier if I am playing local or near home.
How do you find support and community with other working parents in or out of the music industry?
I am so lucky to have other friends in the industry who are moms and with whom I can communicate, commiserate and celebrate. It has been a real boon for me. I am also blessed with friends outside the industry who help keep me sane by reminding me that we are the same. We are all dealing with so many of the same issues as parents, our children are just at different stages in their growth. I feel really fortunate to have people to talk to.
What's one specific example of an organization/venue/company doing something great to help support working parents?
I am really thankful for the AFC (https://afchelps.ca) which provided me with financial support when I really needed it. One of my friends told me about its existence when I had my health issues and needed to take some time away from performing but didn’t have any savings. The AFC helped sustain me while I was able to do that.
What could a music event (festival, conference, etc.), do or provide to make it easier for you to participate?
I always advocate for better pay for Canadian and local musicians across the board so that they can continue to work in this industry and invest in their careers. Performing fees for musicians need to keep pace with the economy so that we can work in a healthy way and take good care of ourselves and our families. It’s a win for everyone.
Can you shout out another music mama doing great things?
Shout out to Shakura S’aida, Amanda Martinez, Zaki Ibrahim, Laila Biali, Jackie and Kim Richardson, Sarah Slean, and Jill Barber.
