@eauthemusic

Where were you at in your music career when you had your first child? Was there much discussion about how that life choice would affect your career within the music/entertainment industry?

I was still learning to sing and play guitar. I wrote my first song, Unfamiliar (with my first band First of the Last Stars) in 2022, when my daughter was still one. My father had been very ill for a long period of time and then passed away. The song is about him. At that time making music was new to me, and it became an important outlet that allowed me to process my emotions. Back then I had no idea where my songwriting journey would take me.

What changed for you when you became a parent in this industry? (or faced when your children were younger if relevant)?  (Could be submitted in video, repeating question)

I was only ever a parent in the music industry so I can’t compare it to anything else. However I do feel immense support among artists that are parents. There is an absence of competitiveness which is very refreshing, as though we’re all in it together.

What is one change (big or small) within the industry that could make a positive impact for working parents?

I think there could be more acknowledgment within the industry that many artists are also parents. And more than just acknowledgement, the industry could do a lot more to highlight and celebrate artists that are parents.

I think there would be more openness among parent-artists to share their struggles and stories if the industry valued such stories, in particular in the rock/alt-rock music scene. Networking events could also be organized to bring parent artists together so they can connect and learn from each other. Learning from people’s stories can really inspire and motivate others who may not think being a parent and an artist can co-exist.

It would also be amazing if there were music grants specifically for parents. Many artists that are parents are struggling. Many juggle day jobs, parenting and music, and balancing all three can be very difficult. Grants focused on emerging parent-artists, for example, would go a long way to incentivize burgeoning artists to pursue a music career while parenting. There could also be workshops and residencies geared towards parents. There are some great artist-entrepreneur programs out there, however they can be hard for parents to attend in person in another city for example. Online opportunities would go a long way to help bridge that gap.

Finish this sentence: “Being a parent in music is…” (Could be submitted in video, repeating question)

Being a parent in music is extremely fulfilling. Sharing my joy for music with my family is so important. I love how I’m able to transmit my love for the arts to our child and instill in her the relevance and significance of art, which I hope she’ll be able to carry with her throughout her life. Children gravitate towards making art, and as an artist I feel as though I can really lean in and foster that side of our child’s development.

How do you find support and community with other working parents in or out of the music industry?

I find and offer support through sharing stories with other parents. In the music community here in Ottawa, there are boatloads of artists that are also parents. Going to each other’s’ shows when we can make it, supporting each other online and in real life makes a big difference. It’s about acknowledging that there’s space for everyone, a place for every story and so many shared life experiences.

What’s one specific example of an organization/venue/company doing something great to help support working parents?

This initiative is a great example, and I’m grateful for this opportunity to speak as an artist and a parent.

What could a music event (festival, conference, etc.), do or provide to make it easier for you to participate?

Conferences could include an online option, or they could be held for a shorter number of days. As I mentioned above, there could be more networking opportunities, workshops and residencies geared towards parents. Festivals could have a few slots for new parent artists within their emerging artist portfolio.

What advice would you give to someone in music who’s thinking about becoming a parent? 

Don’t be afraid to meet and talk to parents in the music industry and ask them questions. Becoming a parent for me opened a whole new way of connecting to people, and I’ve learned that there is a lot of support between parents in various industries. I would also say that while the first few months after welcoming a child into the world can be all consuming, with time things become easier. There are also phases where free time may be more difficult to find. It’s all about looking at things long term and accepting that there will be peaks and valleys of creativity: periods of more intense creativity, followed by slower moments of living and embracing life. Having a support system in place, either with a partner, family member or outside care makes a very big difference.

I would also say that becoming a parent and maintaining music requires ensuring some self-care takes place: I think it’s true for all parents, and even more so for parents working and juggling music. It’s all about maintaining a balanced, healthy lifestyle, inside and out, and knowing your own needs –realistically, what that looks like will fluctuate over time depending on the age of your child/ren, everyone’s health, and whatever else is going on in your life.

Becoming a parent can provide a well of creative inspiration. Not only can it offer opportunities to heal unhealed emotional wounds, it pushes us to embrace the present moment: life’s fleeting nature becomes very apparent when caring for children. Time goes by exponentially faster and things are always changing.

Can you shout out another music mama doing great things?

I’m in awe of what DomLand (an Ottawa-based neo-soul and R&B artist) has accomplished as a singer and songwriter. Her music and her voice are so authentic and vulnerable.